World’s Worst Snack Mom Does Halloween

According to my children I’m a total embarrassment when it comes my turn to bring snack to school and team events.  The rancor is so bad I don’t even bother to ask them what they’d like me to bring anymore, nor do I take them to the grocery store when it’s time to buy the snacks.  It’s a wrestling match I can do without.  It’s not like I don’t give them choices but apparently my ideas are almost too horrible to think about.  I suggest things like orange slices and popcorn, low sugar protein bars and bananas, bitty peanut butter sandwiches on whole wheat (cut into interesting shapes like footballs) or turkey rollups (with cute sword toothpicks holding them together) and strawberries.  What the heck is wrong with those choices?

That’s right…nothing.  They’re healthy and tasty.  As far as I can tell the only reason the boys don’t want them is that they don’t come out of a cardboard box, aren’t full of chemicals and colors that food doesn’t really come in (like neon green and electric blue) and they might actually have some nutritional value.  BAH!

My little one recently explained to me that school and sports snacks are SUPPOSED to be junk.  He says it’s a treat or a reward for hard work and definitely shouldn’t be healthy.  My older boy once told me that if I kept it up he was going to be ostracized from his soccer team.  This was coincidentally right after I finished serving his team a lovely snack of watermelon cubes and string cheese as the snack mom from the team on the adjoining field walked by with not one, not two, but three boxes of doughnuts for her son’s team.  While I WAS very impressed by his use of the word ostracized, I was not swayed by his argument.

Now here we are with Halloween coming up.  One entire aisle of our grocery store is stacked floor to ceiling with bags of every kind of candy you can imagine.  Every time I pass the aisle my little one will catch my eye and say solemnly “Mom, you’ve got to do a better job on Halloween.”  I have no idea what he’s talking about.  Last year I gave out packets of Angry Bird erasers, the year before booklets of stickers, the year before that crayons and a book to color in.  I think those are wonderful Halloween goodies for the kids.  After all, everybody else hands out candy. What good is one more smashed mini Snickers bar?

This year I’m handing out mini pretzels (they come in bags decorated for Halloween) and Lego figurines…a fantastic reward for any child that decides to tackle the hill leading up to our house.  Not that many do.  They tend to stay in the flatlands where the treat gathering is easy.  My son says they don’t come up because I hand out awful things.  I say they don’t come up because they’re probably too weak.   I say more of them might be able and willing to walk uphill if they weren’t so full of  doughnuts, electric blue snacks and candy!

What kind of evil witch doesn’t hand out candy on Halloween?!?


6 responses

  1. Answer to the evil witch question: An intelligent, beautiful, sweet, caring (evil witch) like you doesn’t hand out candy. I love your evil intentions!

    1. Thank you! They do get plenty of sweet treats but some is never enough. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen the movie ELF but my youngest son is just like that character. His main food groups were candy, candy canes, candy corn and syrup! My little one would be perfectly satisfied with that diet! Glad you stopped in to see me. Happy Monday….

  2. Your post made me laugh! I think it is great you bring healthy snacks. I don’t hand out candy on Halloween either. People always joke that kids who come to our house get rice cakes.

    1. Yay for rice cakes! SO…I’m not the only one. My poor boys will have to adjust thier minds to the fact that there ARE others like me out there! They’re silly anyway…they get plenty of school, at friend’s houses, at games when I’m not the designated snack bringer. They hardly suffer although they’d beg to differ!

  3. Unfortunately your young one is right and wrong at the same time… We are from different generations. Actually probably all pro team give their players Gatorade (Go Gators!) but we know the drink doesn’t help… That’s what your little one and most kids watch, pro players drinking and eating junk. So, they want to drink and eat the same junk… It’s “cool” for them.

    But you keep doing and preparing the best for them… 😉

    1. Yes…my little one SO wants the blue Gatorade. It’s really not that bad for my boys although to hear them whine you’d think I never let them have ANY junk. I only do one game each season so all the rest are full of Oreos, Doritos and sugar laden drinks. They get junk at school all the time too (although I pack their lunches) and every time there’s a birthday party or they go to friend’s houses too. They’d have you think they were on permanent lockdown!

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