Alien Infiltrator

I worked out with an alien the other day.   Well, I didn’t actually do a workout with her but we were in the gym at the same time and believe me I kept a close eye on her.  I’ve seen this alien before.  She always wears a hat…a knit cap that’s big and bulbous on top.  She has a tiny face and the cap bulges out above her in quite a strange and remarkable way.  I initially thought she had some long dreads tucked up there which would explain why the top of her head is so giant in comparison to her little, pointy chin but truth be told I’ve never seen any dreads so now I’m pretty sure it’s just her head.  To complete the look she wears huge, mirrored sunglasses. That’s right sunglasses for an inside workout and she’s always completely covered from wrist to ankle in a tight, long-sleeved shirt and leggings.  She’s a rather slight, little thing and looks just about like this.

The alien in my gym looks like this except she wears a bulbous knit cap which makes her head look enormous on top

The alien in my gym looks like this except she wears a bulbous knit cap which makes her head look enormous on top and she doesn’t have a price tag (that I can see) on her big, mirrored glasses.

I try to be polite, but it’s hard not to stare.  When I was a child my mother would always tell me to stop staring at someone I found interesting for one thing or another. I complied but wondered why I had to avert my eyes when it was clear that the person I was fascinated by wanted to be looked at. Why else would they appear in public like they did?  The guy with about 1000 necklaces (think Mr T) comes to mind, also the guy who put maroon henna markings all over his face and the woman with the beehive hairdo at the gift shop that was so high I was sure she was going to fall over one day if that thing got just a little out of balance.  But I digress.

My observations of this little woman were quite enough to make me suspect her alien origins and then I walked into the locker room and found her wearing this.

space suit

That’s right!  I’m not kidding.  She was in a space suit!  Now I’m absolutely sure she’s not from Earth!

There’s another lady in the gym who has been showing up lately wearing a surgical mask.  You know why?  I think she’s on to the alien and she’s worried that she’s going to be exposed to some sort of pathogen by being in close proximity to the foreign life form.

My gym is a strange place, a strange place indeed!


5 responses

  1. haha I love this post, totally made me laugh. I work out at the gym at work, so it’s all work peers and no one is really weird. They all have to go back to their desks after. I guess it’s a good thing. I think *I* may just go in and teach a spin class in a silver suit! Sadly, no one would think I was odd LOL. I’m cray like that haha! Thanks for the post!

    1. So glad you stopped by! I DO have some stories about other members. I swear there is always something new to see. Today I saw some interesting tattoos. There was a man with a skull on the back of his leg but it was colored in like an American flag…very creative. The was also a young women (early 20’s) who had tattoos all over her upper body. She was wearing a sports bra so you could see most of the designs…birds, flowers etc. I’m definitely a people watcher. So much to see!

  2. You’ll have to wear a tin foil hat so they can’t read your mind

    1. Yes, yes…tinfoil. It will interrupt any thought control attempts!

  3. We have dudes that workout in that training mask that is supposed to simulate high altitude training. They kind of look like a dressed down Darth Vader. We also have a lot of dudes that wear a mouth piece while working out…maybe they are worried that they may get into a MMA fight at any moment! Just remember…we are not alone! If you need backup when and if the aliens rise, just yell and I’ll be there! Good day my beautiful spider monkey!

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